Blackberries & Robins: Lessons in Contentment
Prior to the last year, we had been living with my husband’s parents for a year and a half, since coming home from Japan, while we waited for his orders to drop for tech school. What we thought would be a wait of six months max, had turned out to be a nearly two year endeavor; hurry up and wait as the saying goes. That time was not without its challenges. Thankfully, my in laws had been beyond gracious to us and we were severely blessed because of them. Finances were often tight, as my husband had originally just found a job to cover our expenses while we waited, but it was always more than enough. Time alone, as a family of three, had been few and far between, but time with extended family was so good. Things are moving along nicely now as he is wrapping up the training he had been waiting for! However, below was a journal entry I had written about contentment and the conviction I had felt during that season.
Many times my heart has resided in a place of worry and discontentment. And, while my desires aren’t necessarily bad, my heart posture behind them can become murky.
The desire to have a space of our own.
The desire to want a little homestead fitted with chickens, a few goats and maybe a cow just to name a few.
A garden that I can tend to on just a bit of land.
A big kitchen to bake loaves and loaves to feed my family and friends with.
No, these desires are not bad. But the ungratefulness and lack of patience is wicked. In my head, and my heart, contentment has really only ever been on display in seasons where I had all that I wanted. How foolish and counterfeit!
The past few weeks I have been seeing more and more how the Lord provides in every aspect of my life. Whether it be relationally, physically or with my emotions. He provides for all those things and more as way for Himself to be glorified and for me to ‘lie down in green pastures and for Him to restore my soul’ (Psalm 23). He has taught me, through His Word, to give thanks in all circumstances (1 Thessalonians 5:16-18). Today, however, my attention was grabbed by how providential, how faithful, our God is.
I was walking outside in the backyard looking at all that had been cleared out by a few friends recently, when I saw a blackberry bush that stretched along the wood line! Josiah called them blueberries, but I tried to explain that they were wild blackberries. I started to show him which ones he could eat and which ones to leave while they still ripened. He quickly started filling up on his portion, and as he did so, I remembered a few weeks ago being sad (read also: discontent) that I didn’t have a garden to take care of, teaching my son a bunch of things about growing food. And, though I hate to admit it, it wasn’t even just that one time that I’d taken to dwelling on that thought. However, here with a bush that the Lord had made grow who knows how long ago, I was able to talk about colors, seasons and how plants grow with my nearly two year old son; although I’m not sure how much he understood. I thanked the Lord for His gift.
About ten minutes later a baby Robin fell out of his nest. I placed it in a dry plastic kiddie pool and, before I put him back in his nest, showed Josiah. I pointed out to him that it was a baby, still growing feathers, that it came from an egg and how it would open its mouth because it was hungry. He joyfully watched the baby bird until I was able to locate his nest under the deck. Then, just as I had about the blackberry bush, I remembered the times in the past year I grumbled about not having chickens. A petty thing to grumble about. Of course, the Robin isn’t the same thing as a chicken, but it too reminded me of the Lord’s provision. While I can’t collect eggs and sustainably eat them from a Robin as I would a hen, the Lord still gave me a way to teach my son about the Lord’s creation and His animals. He gave me memories to make with Josiah. I asked the Lord to forgive me for a grumbling and discontent heart.
A verse was then brought to my mind:
“Not that I am speaking of being in need, for I have learned in whatever situation I am to be content” Philippians 4:11
After all the Lord has provided, how may I be discontent? And I’m not only talking about His day to day provision, but His provision in saving me, a sinner. Not only does He daily provide what I need, through a hard working husband, but He has given me a goodly heritage in Himself (Psalms 16:6). He saved me and gave me the only way to be reconciled to a Holy God. He provided hope in the life, death, resurrection and ascension of Jesus. What more do I need apart from Jesus and His sacrifice? Is that not more than enough, just in itself, to be content? With whatever is or is not in my life, I am to be contented in the work of God through Christ; from that everything else flows. In all that He has given and in all that He has not, I am to be content in.
The Lord has not sent us to our own home yet, but has given us invaluable time with our family; memories that will forever be cherished.
The Lord has not given us chickens, but today gave us a Robin to help remind us of His faithfulness in the smallest things.
The Lord has not given us a garden that grows on acres, but instead has given us a blackberry bush to be enjoyed in the hot summer mornings.
The Lord has not given us our own kitchen in which to bake for a multitude, but rather has given us a borrowed kitchen to make a loaf or two to share in cozy hospitality.
As the old hymn goes, “All I have needed thy hand hath provided. Great is thy faithfulness Lord, unto me”
