An Open Letter: You Can’t Follow the Head and Abandon the Body
**Please know that this was an assignment for a class that I took part in with a few ladies. We had an end of course project and one of the options was to write a letter to a friend (a professing believer) who has expressed they no longer attend a physical church due to past hurt and that they wish to seek out their spirituality individually. I thought it would be good to include it on the blog. In today’s world it is so important to faithfully uphold the truth that we were never meant to be disjointed from a physical church body, but also be faithful to our friends who may have experienced real conflict in the body that was supposed to take care of them. Obviously, since this letter was a project and didn’t mention a specific scenario, I do not speak on a specific scenario within it or discuss principles such as Matthew 18. Take this open letter as a foundation for when you need to address the question of “Why do I even have to belong to a church?”. **
Dearest friend,
I have been thinking and praying over the conversation that we had the other day. You came to me with disappointment, hurt and a sense that it would be better for you to seek out your own spirituality rather than being a part of an organized church.
Unfortunately, the people who were supposed to reflect Christ acted in a way that harmed you, it’s disorienting. The place where you expected to find love, truth and healing was instead a place where you were met with pain. While I cannot undo what is done, I can understand the temptation to give up. However, we are never called to give up and instead are called to rely on God’s strength. It is my hope to walk you through the process of understanding what Scripture, our final authority, says about belonging to a church; the church being not just a building or institution, but the body of Christ. I want to try and answer the question of “Why does it matter if I go to church?” The answer has many roots that stretch into the very nature of the church and God’s design for His covenant people.
One of the most pointed biblical metaphors about the church found in Scripture is that the church is the body of Christ. In 1 Corinthians 12:12-27 Paul writes, “For just as the body is one and has many members…so it is with Christ” (v. 12). In the same chapter we see that no part has the ability, or even the authority, to say to the others “I do not need you.” Every part belongs and every part is needed. Moreover, Paul is describing the deeper workings than that of weekly attendance; he is trying to show that being in Christ means being organically joined to the others in whom Christ has also called. In the context of Corinthians, Paul had to address the congregation about divisions and the spiritual pride that was taking place. And what do we find in his exhortation? We find that he doesn’t encourage them to walk away from the church when it gets messy, but he calls them to see one another as essential, serving with humility and to remember that they are one body who are under one head, which is Christ Jesus.
When you are a born-again Christian, you have been “born” into the body spiritually already. However, to be healthy, a body part must stay connected. An arm cut off from the body, while it is still an arm, will be a shriveled up and decaying mess. Just as the arm cannot survive on its own, neither can you survive spiritually separated from the community that God has ordained for our good, growth, nourishment and His glory.
We also find another example of the importance of church in Ephesians 2:19-22. Here Paul writes “You are no longer strangers and aliens, but fellow citizens with the saints and members of the household of God, built on the foundation of the apostles and prophets, Christ Jesus himself being the cornerstone, in whom the whole structure, being joined together, grows into a holy temple in the Lord. In Him you are also being built together into a dwelling place for God by the Spirit.” Summed up: The church is a family and a temple who are being built together and not built apart. It is here we see the covenantal nature of our God and how He calls us, not just to a personal relationship with Himself, but to a covenantal fellowship with His people. Covenantal relationships mean that we are to walk together, worship together, bear one another’s burdens and even hold each other accountable should one brother stumble and wander away. And notice that this covenant is not placed upon a perfect people, but is placed upon a perfect God in whom we come to dwell under. Which means that yes, churches will disappoint us, but the answer is not to walk away from the church. Instead, the answer is to love her as Christ does, even in her brokenness.
When we do face disappointment in the body, it is important to remember that the church is God’s idea and not man’s idea. Jesus Himself, in Matthew 16:18, says “I will build my church, and the gates of hell shall not prevail against it.”. The church is not just a collection of individuals, but is the very bride of Christ, His treasured possession and is the very community for whom He died.
Another reason to stay in fellowship with the body of believers is that the Church is a way in where God ordinarily grows and feeds His people. God uses ordinary means to accomplish extraordinary things. His Word, sacraments and prayer are what we would describe as “means of grace”. The gathering of the body is a place where these means of grace are regularly administered to us. Paul tells Timothy in 2 Timothy 4:2 to “preach the Word; be ready in season and out of season; reprove, rebuke and exhort, with complete patience and teaching.” This command is not about the individual’s spiritual life, but about the corporate life of the church, specifically in Worship to God. It is in the local church where God’s very word is preached and then applied, where baptism and the Lord’s Supper are administered and where believers are regularly and continuously exhorted. These are not extras that you may take or leave; these are the very tools, the means in which His great grace, build up His people.
As it happens, I have been in a class where we have read about Ecclesiology (study of the Church). In Systematic Theology by Wayne Grudem, he says “the church is the community of all true believers for all time” (ch. 44) and he also continues to affirm the importance of the visible church; the local congregation where physical people gather physically, to be shaped by God’s Word and to worship together. This is the same teaching in Hebrews 10:24-25, which calls us not to neglect meeting together, “as in the habit of some,” but to encourage one another as the day of the Lord draws near. The author of Hebrews is not trying to put us on a guilt trip in order to push us to attend church, but is saying that when believers meet, we are strengthened in our faith, given endurance, hear God speak through His Word and our hearts are lifted.
I do not say any of this to minimize your pain. I say it, because I truly believe, and see in Scripture, that healing is more likely to come through the church than apart from it. Yes, God heals us of hurt and empowers us to forgive and to come back from wrongs committed against us, but He also instituted the place where others can physically come alongside of us. The church that you previously attended has failed to reflect Christ, but that doesn’t equal the church (as in the whole body of Christ) as being wrong. Instead, we need to seek out gospel-centered, faithful churches that are committed to humility, repentance and truth. Even though the earthly church isn’t perfect, a true church is marked by certain fruit such as faithful preaching of the Word, the right handling of the sacraments and even correct exercise of church discipline.
It’s important to remember that we serve an ordered God. We remember that it is He who, while we were still sinners, sent His son to die on our behalf. We see the ordered lead up throughout the Old Testament and into the New Testament! Everything pointing to Jesus Christ. We can trust in the God of our ordered Salvation just the same as we can trust Him in the establishment of His church.
Friend, please don’t give up on church. Christ hasn’t and is still helping His bride be purified in calling us to holiness, using her to bless the world. Not only is He calling you to be apart of that, but He is leading you to be cared for, loved and built up within it. We are all in need of grace and it is our great God who has chosen the church to be one of the main places where we receive it.
With Love and Hope,
Charlene
